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Flood Monner

Flood Monner (that’s what I’m calling it) has been declared a 100 year, 500 year or 1000 year storm depending on who you are listening to. That means scientists expect a storm of this magnitude to happen every bunch of years. I’m hoping I’ve lived through my last one.

If I can give you guys one piece of advice, (construction language) happens. Our home is at the top of a hill. Flooding is the last thing that we thought could happen. Simply put, it rained so hard and for so long the ground became so saturated, the water started coming into the house from every crack and crevice in our foundation.

Our mountain and valley is experiencing natural springs that have not been active in ten years. We have creeks running (two weeks after the storm) that I have never seen carrying water.

But, with all bad comes a little good. This storm created what my family is now calling the “FLOOD MONNER FORTY YEAR HOME PURGE” .We are throwing some “old stuff” away”. Good memory stuff, not so good memory stuff. Stuff, unfortunately, stored on the bottom shelves of cabinets that you forget about and look at once every twenty years, or when you change homes.

I found a high school football jersey (that accidentally followed me home) almost forty years ago. Hey, this is my story and that’s the way I’m telling it. Besides, the Statute of Limitations has long expired. What, do you think I was always this wonderful?

If (John Denver inspired) High School wants it back, they can have it. It hasn’t survived all that well.

Our diplomas were damaged. I have mixed emotions about that. I’ve never shown mine to anyone, anyway. I know some of you don’t believe have them, and you would be right. Now I don’t!

Elaine’s favorite books have been damaged. Books she read as a child, her grandparents books were sitting in the water. Our high school annuals were sitting in the water.

“Hey Felix, Do you know what you wrote in the junior year annual?” You wrote, “to a guy that’s funny as (low-level construction language). Good luck at (John Denver inspired)! Hey, who knew?

Let’s get to the good stuff! We were able to purge our home of 9 years of the Twins’ toys. Stuff they just couldn’t live without. Girl Twin has/had over forty stuffed animals. Sadly, some of them could not swim.

Girl Twin informed us, she could get new ones. Out of the mouths of babes! Could she really think we are geting them replaced? Now, that’s a good one!

Our old albums were stored at flood level in the basement. Eric Clapton’s “Layla” was among them. If there was a better album, I could name it. Elaine and I played “Layla” at our wedding. The covers of several Jerry Jeff Walker albums did not survive. Just a minute, I need to wipe away a couple of tears. This is getting too emotional for me, I need to change gears.

Our washing machine doesn’t work. Our furnace won’t shut off and rattles. Our home office, computer, sattelite internet was destroyed. Couch, kids beds, and dressers were sitting in water. Do you have any idea how heavy carpet can be when it is dripping with water?

Ivy has/had stuff stored in our basement. Her yarn stash was lessened. Ivy (and Elaine) have enough yarn that end to end would circle the earth enough times create a walking path that could be seen from space. That path is not as wide today.

As some of you know, I have dabbled in the construction industry. As a matter of fact, I dabbled in my now destroyed basement. I met a mother of the Twins’ friend on the street. She expressed some sympathy for the damage FLOOD MONNER bestowed on our basement. And then she said, “Well, at least you know how to repair it!’ I never thought of it that way!

Before I close this out, I need to say thank you to a bunch of people. (Some of them read this crap)

In my construction life, I have the greatest employer in the world. Thanks! M and B, (our neighbors) when we tried to quit, you didn’t let us! Thanks! Thank you, to all the customers that called and offered to help!

The store was closed for four days during the cleanup of our home. We are back, come buy something, I need to replace some stuffed animals.

Our crazy lives!


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