Walter’s Shiny Coat

I know that I have been writing about poultry quite a lot recently. Ivy gets impatient with me when I do not write about yarn. Well, the truth is April is a slow month for yarn. Tax season takes its toll on everyone’s desire to buy things (not just yarn). And some of you are on yarn diets. Oh brother! Yarn can’t make you heavy. If you are too heavy because of yarn, put the yarn down and check the scale again.

Oh well, I don’t think yarn is what people want to talk about anyway. Not one time in my construction life has anyone asked, “How is your yarn today?” or “Did you buy that at Your Daily Fiber?’ Nope, not once. People have asked me, “Hey, how are your chickens?” or “Hey, do you have any eggs for sale?”

Sorry Ivy, I’m going to write about what people want to read about. POULTRY!

This week I need to discuss guinea fowl. I know, I just wrote about the guineas, but this time I will add a dog. Oh yeah, and Elaine.

We bought guineas last year because of Elaine’s fear of rattlesnakes. (As I’ve said before, Rattlesnakes hate noise-Guinea fowl never quit squawking) We thought it would be great if they would also produce eggs. Although, most people have never eaten guinea eggs (and probably won’t).

I researched guinea eggs and found out they are smaller than chicken eggs. Their flavor is similar to chicken eggs. Guinea eggs are “pointy” on the small end the shell are much harder than chicken eggs (this will become important to the story later). Guineas typically lay eggs on the ground.

Guineas are very hard to determine if they are male or female, even for the resident poultry expert, Ivy. If Ivy is not knitting, designing patterns or selling yarn, she is on the internet looking up some obscure disease she is convinced the poultry has.

We haven’t harvested any guinea eggs. We are sure our guineas are male.

Last week, our assumption that the guineas were male proved wrong. (Every time I write I was wrong a pain shoots up my left arm, I just hate that) We found guinea eggs!

Actually, Elaine found guinea eggs. Elaine did not read the paragraph above and did not know what guinea eggs look like. (OK, I had not written the paragraph yet when she found the eggs.) Elaine did what everyone would do when they found an egg that looked strange to them. She threw the egg into the pasture.

Ivy and I arrived home and Eline mentioned she found a weird egg in the chicken coop.

Elaine: I found a weird egg today. Me: What did it look like? Elaine: Small and pointy. Ivy: Where is it? Elaine: I threw it in the pasture; it bounced. Me: That was a guinea egg, I wish you hadn’t thrown it away. Elaine: There are more in the chicken coop.

As Elaine and Ivy were going into the chicken coop, Walter (our shiny coated, getting bigger every day, Great Dane mix dog) was coming out. Elaine and Ivy found no additional eggs in the chicken coop. Walter looked really happy.

Elaine: I know there were more eggs in here. Ivy: Walter spends a lot of time in the coop.

That (construction language) dog was eating the guinea eggs and not telling anyone.

Luckily, Ivy and Elaine went into the pasture and found the egg Elaine had thrown. It was not broken. (this is the part about hard shell.) Ivy took the egg inside and cracked it. It looked like a chicken egg, just like the internet predicted. Ivy ran it down the drain, who knows how long it was in the coop, Walter migtht have missed that one!

Our crazy lives!

Monner.