I haven’t written in a while. Something had to give. I don’t have time to renew my coaching career and write these entertaining stories. Even if they don’t entertain anyone else, they entertain me. I sit at the computer and smile as I write. The kids giggle at me using my seventh grade typing skills. I know they may not enjoy the stories but they do enjoy watching me struggle.
This baseball thing I VOLUNTEERED for, is killing me. Flood Monner left me with remodel ideas for our house. I need to finish the siding on the chicken coop. (0h yeah, with the new ducks and chickens we are adding on to the coop. I told you I was regretting that decision.) We will be shearing the llamas, and those (construction language) animals need to be fed every night.
Now I’m thinking I might need another job.
Not only is baseball a free time zapper, it is killing my wallet also. I had no idea kids baseball could be so expensive. Ok, I knew it was expensive, I just forgot. I’ll get to that in a minute.
Just signing up for the league will set you back a couple hundred bucks, You get twelve games plus a tournament for two hundred dollars. Multiply by Boy Twin and then Girl Twin. Did I mention you need a uniform to play? That will set you back about another hundred. The kids are going to need special shoes-Thirty dollars minimum.
What about a baseball glove? If your kid can survive the embarrassment, you can get a glove a Wally World for twenty-five dollars. Of course, the other kids are going to make fun of the kid with the Wally World glove, so just plan on getting your glove at an exclusive sports store. Bring a hundred bucks, you don’t want your child feeling bad about himself because he has a Wally World glove.
Don’t tell your child the kids in the Dominican Republic play barehanded. Your kid will say, “That’s too bad, maybe we could send them my old glove, when I get my new hundred dollar glove.” Our kids are nice like that.
Of course, the kids will need a water bottle. God forbid they would need to use a drinking fountain. Don’t assume you can get a water bottle at Wally World. When you were buying their baseball glove at the specialty sports store your kid saw the water bottles. You would not leave with a thirsty kid, would you?
Then comes the real expense, the one I wasn’t prepared for. After every game you need to take your family to dinner. This expense might be a result of where I live in relationship to the location of the games. Or more likely, it is a result of Elaine enjoying eating out after the games. You are probably think we could stop for a fast-food burger on the way home. NOPE! we drive across town to one of our new favorite restaurants. The kind that are guaranteed to take an hour and a half of your time and eighty dollars of your money. Hmmm, I might be sounding a little snippy. I’m sorry, I am having fun. I could be at home building a chicken coop. Which would you choose?
Do you see why I might need another job? I could build a chicken coop in your yard. Maybe I could make these stories scary. Stephan King has plenty of money. I could call myself Monner King. Get it?!
Oh well, I need to go fix something.
Our crazy lives!