Monner and the Massage Parlor

I’ve mentioned a couple times, I’m back at the mall working on a construction project. I haven’t said much about it, mostly because I am trying to forget I’m part of it.

I’ll give you a little background information on how this all got started.

Back in the ’90′s I was working with a guy building Walblues Drug stores. Man, No wonder I feel so old; I’ve built a lot of stuff. Anyway, eventually I decided maybe there was enough Walblues in the world and decided to work closer to home.

So, twenty-five years later (feeling old again) I get a call from the same guy from Walblues. Let’s call him Jerry.

Jerry: Hey Monner, I heard you were working in the mall. Me: I WAS working in the mall. Jerry: Hey, I have something in the mall you might be interested in. Me: I’m building houses, but I guess I can listen. Jerry: Great, why don’t you come down and meet with my partner and see if we can’t work something out. Me: Jerry, where would down be? (I haven’t talked to him for around twenty-five years.) Jerry: Denver, our office is in Denver.

We made arrangements to meet around noon for a quick meeting followed by a lunch.

On the day of the meeting, I left for Denver in plenty of time to get to the meeting. A short time into my drive, I noticed a temporary sign informing me (and others) the highway is closed a ways down the road.

Sometimes, even I don’t understand my thought process. But I was thinking, this is a major interstate highway, there is no way that sign means closed, closed. It probably means they will let me through. Heck, I’m a native. A native with a lot of ego. I kept driving.

Twenty more miles, another sign. That sign says “Highway closed, 30 miles”. The sign didn’t say, ”Monner, Highway closed”, the sign obviously was meant for some else. I kept driving.

Twenty-seven more miles down the highway I came to a dead stop. With three miles of cars in front of me! Why didn’t those traffic signs have my name on them? I could have found another road.

My one hour trip to Denver turned into three and half hours. Jerry and his partner (also named Jerry) were willing to wait for me. Of course, the lunch portion of the meeting was lost, never to be rescheduled. I should have turned around and went back home. I didn’t.

At the meeting, the Jerrys informed me they had been awarded a contract to build a massage parlor/day spa at the all. (People seem to get all weird when I call it a massage parlor. I don’t know why. You go there to get a massage. Well, I don’t, but if I wanted to pay someone to massage me, I could go there.) The Jerrys and I discussed how we could make the project lucrative for all parties.

At the meeting I explain to the Jerrys that the town has a shortage of actual workers. There is a tremendous amount of construction in town and most projects are behind schedule. I told the Jerrys to make sure that they/we have plenty of time to build the project. We agreed to the terms and I left to build a massage parlor.

Well, guess what! The massage parlor is behind schedule. If you were planning on a Halloween back rub you might need to talk to your significant other.

Its not only the lack of workers that are slowing down the project, but we can talk about that some other time. OK, we can talk about some of it now. We can talk about how come a sign guy shows up; I think from Minnesota to install the sign on the outside of the building. He wasn’t working for me/us so I asked him what he was doing.

Sign guy: I’m putting up the signage. Me: That can’t be where anyone would want it. Sign guy: That’s where my paperwork tells me to put it. Me: Aren’t signs supposed to be seen from the street? Sign guy: I just put it where they tell me, buddy. . The next day he came back to move the sign.

Sign guy: Hey Monner, can you patch the holes in the building where the sign used to be? Me: (construction language)

I guess they wash their own towels in this massage parlor. I will be installing two washer/dryer units in the store. We built the store for electric dryers. Unfortunately, we received gas dryers. Its the little things like that keep me entertained.

Seriously, its going to be a nice place. Some of you are going to like it.

Have you noticed the NEW just FINISHED landscaping in the mall courtyard being torn out? Now that’s a story!

Our crazy lives!

Monner