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Starch and Campfires

April 16, 2017

Happy Easter!

 

This Easter has not been all that happy, but it is memorable.  I lost an ex-sister-in law and friend last night.  RIP Nanc, your struggles are over.  Thanks for reading and laughing with me.

 

********

 

Following the lead of Boy Twin, I would like to announce Your Daily Fiber will be expanding and will become Your Daily Fiber and Snacks.

 

This week I caught Boy Twin dragging out the ironing board.  I found this extremely weird due to the fact I have never seen him iron ANYTHING in his life.  Hey, come to think of it, I've never seen me iron anything, either.  Stay with me folks.  I'll get back to Boy Twin in a minute, but this is a time to talk about ME!

 

My mother insisted she iron all of mine and my brothers clothes.  I guess it wasn't the ironing that was the problem, it was the starch.  Mom soaked our jeans and shirts in some kind of blue liquid she called starch.  After soaking our clothes she would iron them.  Our clothes were as stiff as a piece of wood. 

 

When Elaine and I were married. Elaine tried to iron my clothes.  

 

Me:  Hey what are you doing?

Elaine:  Your shirt has wrinkles, I'm ironing your shirt.

Me:  Don't ever iron my clothes.

Elaine:  Your shirt looks really bad.

Me:  And that's the way we are going to keep them.

 

So, now that you know that, please don't blame Elaine when you see me.  Blame my Mom!

 

Anyway, back to Boy Twin.  He wasn't planning on ironing his clothes, he was going to iron his money.

 

Me:  Are you OK?

Boy Twin:  I'm going to iron my money.

Me:  Why?

Boy Twin:  People really like it when I give change.

Me:  Why are you giving change?

Boy Twin:  I sell drinks at school.

 

Before I could process another thought, Girl Twin said, "He is taking Croc-Aids to school from the pantry, he sells them at school."  Boy Twin beamed, "I get two bucks each.  I'm going to buy earphones!"

 

Me:  You realize Grandma and I are paying for the Croc-Aids?

Boy Twin:  Yeah, I'm going to sell bags of chips next.

Me:  I don't think you understand.  You are selling MY stuff.

Boy Twin:  OK, I'll start buying the chips.  I'm saving for new earphones.

 

Stop by the store if you need a bag of chips and a drink.  Your change will be ironed and crisp.  Boy Twin needs earphones.

 

*******

 

The Forest Service has been doing a contolled burn this past week a few miles from our home.  For the last five days the air has smelled like a campfire.  Who doesn't like the smell of a campfire?

 

Last night (at 3:40 AM) I woke to the overhelming smell of a campfire.  3:40 AM is not the time you want to enjoy campfire smells.  I jumped out of the bed to make sure the campfire was not in the house.  After that, I checked to see if the controlled burn was no longer controlled and had moved closer to our house.   

 

I went back to bed, but I couldn't go back to sleep.  I wondered why no one else woke up from the smell.   Five days of smoke smell is enough, it is starting to be horrible.

 

********

 

I learned this week, even though the twins are fourteen, I was expected to dye eggs.  Well, we did that.  I'm thinking of letting Boy Twin take the eggs to school.  Eggs Dyed by Darrell. I like the sound of that.

 

*********

 

Fairy God Mother, you are the best. God bless you.  

 

Our crazy lives

 

Monner

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