Monner's Surgery Day

If it seems like you haven’t read anything new from me in a while, you are probably right. I haven’t been keeping up with my part of our deal. (I write, you read, laugh and sometimes cry.) By the amount of likes and shares I have been getting, you guys haven’t been keeping your part of the deal, either.

It’s been a tough couple of weeks. I had my oral surgery. I don’t remember having surgery, but my jaw gums and tooth have hurt for the last 10 days, so I’m pretty sure something happened. I’m serious, I don’t remember having surgery.

My young dentist prescribed three pills for me to take before my procedure. The first pill I was to take before bed the night before the procedure. I took the pill and went immediately to sleep. I got up the morning of the procedure ready to “do this thing”.

I was instructed to take the second pill one hour before the procedure. I took the second pill right before we left the house. It is about an hour’s drive to the dentist’s office. I jumped in the driver seat per usual. Turned out to not be such a great idea.

Before you start judging, the dentist told me to bring someone along to drive home. She didn’t say anything about driving to her office. About fifteen minutes into our trip Elaine asked if I needed her to drive. I said, “No, why?” Elaine said, “You just don’t seem right.” About a half an hour into our trip Elaine screamed, “Pull over, now!” I pulled the truck over and Elaine drove the rest of the way.

That’s the last thing I remember for the next ten or so hours. Oh, I had some memory of the day. I remember standing in the dentist office after arriving. I don’t remember leaving the office and postponing the procedure for 3-1/2 hours because the dentist had some computer problems.

I remember finally sitting in the dentist’s chair (I didn’t remember it being, finally. I thought I was just getting started.) I remember the dental assistant asking me if I needed another pill. “Well, who doesn’t?” She crushed another pill and told me to put it under my tongue.

What I remember of the procedure was the dentist telling me to move my head left or right. I remember her telling me, I was going to hear some grinding. I heard it. When the dentist finished, I remember her asking if I wanted to see what she had done. At this point, I don’t think I was capable of seeing anything. I remember telling her I didn’t want to see it.

That’s about it for memories of the day. Elaine tells me we went to the local warehouse store, where she filled a prescription for me. She tells me I laid in the car while she went inside the store. She tells me it took about 45 minutes in the store.

Please don’t judge Elaine poorly for leaving me in a hot car like a miniature poodle. She tells me she rolled down all four windows of the car, leaving me exposed to murderers, robbers, and assorted thugs.

Elaine tells me I offered to go in the store with her. I’m nice like that, so I believe her when she says that. Since I don’t remember being left in the HOT car for forty-five minutes (like a poodle) and I didn’t have my wallet stolen; I will not be pressing charges.

I think I spent some portion of the day at Your Daily Fiber. (Hey, I just worked the store into this story. Ivy, will really be happy with me.) I think it was during the 3-1/2 hour wait for the dentist to fix her computer.

I remember arriving at home. We have 3 steps going up to our front door. I successfully made it up two. I remember stumbling. I also remember Elaine was behind me. You remember, Leave him in the HOT car Elaine. Yep, the same one. Elaine says she kept me from face planting, but can we really be sure.

Elaine tells me I offered to help her get the stuff out of the car and into the house. I’m nice like that! I think Elaine must have told me to go lay down.

When I got up from my nap, I was able to start to put the day together. Most of my memory of the day has been provided by Ol’ Hot Car Elaine.

As you have noticed, I try to keep these stories as factual as possible. Some of the content might prove to be slight less than true. You decide.

I have another story to tell about the wheels, literally, falling off my truck, (I told you it was a rough couple weeks.) but this is getting kind of long.

Our crazy lives!

Monner