Birth Certificates and Passports

If you think the title of this story is about the President, you would be wrong. Other people can have problems with their birth certificate also.

Girl Twin is going to Mexico and needed her first passport. It might seem weird to you that a thirteen year old would be getting her first passport. That’s most likely my fault, I’m not a big traveler. I did enough traveling in my construction career, I’m quite comfortable at home.

You might be surprised that I identify myself with the movie Secondhand Lions. As a young man I traveled around, as I got a little older I had a batch of kids dropped in my lap. Now I am content to stay home sit on my porch and wait for salesmen to come down my driveway. If you haven’t seen the movie, what are you waiting for?

I’m sorry, I got a little sidetracked. This story is not about me or Secondhand Lions. Oh, I’m in the story, but it is not about me.

Girl Twin was asked to accompany a friend and her family to Mexico for a week this summer. Girl Twin will fly into a resort on the Gulf of Mexico and spend a week sitting/playing in the Mexican sun. That does seem like a good time, but if I leave I might miss a salesman.

Elaine and I needed to get Girl Twin’s passport. Elaine found that passports can be applied for at the local courthouse. Elaine picked a day and time the was convenient two both our schedules to meet at the courthouse to submit the applications.

Girl Twin and I arrived at the courthouse early.

Elaine: Where are you guys? Me: At the courthouse. Elaine: I don’t see you, I’m already inside. Me: You must not be at the courthouse. Elaine: I’m looking at the sign that says, “Passports Here”.

Our town has two buildings across the street from each other, one named Courthouse Offices, the other named The Justice Center. The Justice Center is where court is held.

I’ve been to court. When Elaine said go to the courthouse, I went to the courthouse, I went to the Justice Center. Elaine was at the Courthouse Offices. How am I to know? ”Honey, if you would have said Courthouse Offices, I wouldn’t be standing here thinking I need a lawyer.”

The fun didn’t stop there.

When Elaine handed the paperwork, she proudly told the clerk, “We are the Grandparents!” My heart stopped. I thought, “Oh boy, we just opened a can of worms here.”

Clerk: We need to have the parents here. Me: That’s not going to be easy. (My mind was racing.) We are the legal parents. Clerk: I need the people who are listed as parents on the birth certificate. Elaine: That is us. Clerk: But you said……. Me: (interrupting) The names on the birth certificate are ours. It would take too long to explain.

The rest of the application went off perfectly. The clerk was very efficient. Or so we thought.

The next day Elaine was scheduled to work at the house. I spoke with her on the phone and she informed me she was headed to town on her day off. I asked, “Why would you be coming to town?” “The clerk at the Courthouse OFFICES didn’t charge us for everything and I need to take him twenty dollars.”

I renewed my passport also. Just in case something happens to Girl Twin in Mexico. Elaine and I aren’t totally comfortable with Girl Twin in Mexico. I’m hoping I don’t have a Secondhand Lion adventure.

Our crazy lives!

Monner