Love Hurts

Ivy has decreed that I write about the store this week. She has become more aggressive in her management style. Ivy has made it clear that the Monner’s Mumblings blog is located on the Your Daily Fiber website, which Ivy happens to control. She has threatened to remove my stories from the internet, What would I do Sunday mornings?

So, in order to comply with Ivy’s demands I will be writing about Your Daily Fiber, but not just yet.

You might be wondering what the title of this story has to do with a yarn store. The answer is simple, nothing. The title is about our twins, Boy Twin and Girl Twin.

The Homecoming dance is next week. Elaine and I attended the very same high school that the twins attend now. Elaine certainly was a distinguished student at this high school. Me? Not so much. However, now that I think about it, I might have been more memorable than Elaine, but we can’t talk about that here.

OK, I’m back on track now. Due to the fact that Elaine and I are distinguished and memorable alums, I invited myself (and Elaine) to the Homecoming dance. Elaine (of course) refused my invitation, but the invitation scared the (construction language) out of the twins for a couple hours.

If you have been reading my previous stories you will know that Boy Twin and his “smart phone” girlfriend have had some issues. I asked Boy Twin if he asked his “smart phone” GF to the dance.

Boy Twin: No, we’re not going to the dance together

Me: That’s weird, why not.

Boy Twin: We were talking today, we decided just to be friends. But you know what that means.

Me: I’m not sure, what does that mean?

Boy Twin: We are not really going to be friends and we won’t talk to each other anymore.

Me: Are you OK?

Boy Twin: Yeah, Southern Belle (my first “smart phone” GF) wants me to take her to the dance.

Me: That didn’t take long.

Boy Twin: (Smiling) I can’t help it, girls think I’m handsome.

Love hurts!

Girl Twin arrived at school Monday; to be met by a boy at the main entry of the school. She has known for years. This boy had in his hand twelve pink roses, a poster and a package of candy, all for Girl Twin. The poster read as follows, “Homecoming can be sour, make it sweet and say yes.” Elaine and I asked Girl Twin, “Did you give him an answer?”

Girl Twin: I said yes.

Elaine: We’ve never heard you talk about Conrad in this way before, why did you say yes?

Girl Twin: We’re friends and I do like candy.

Boy Twin: Conrad and Girl Twin sittin’ in a tree, K-I-S-S-I-N-G

Me: You need to stay out of this.

Girl Twin: I don’t want anyone to think I’m his girlfriend.

Elaine: It is just a dance and that is all it needs to be. Talk to him.

I don’t understand todays dating. I had just heard from Boy Twin when boyfriends and girlfriends become ”just” friends, they never talk again. Someone might need to help me with this one.

Love hurts!

OK Ivy, I will say something about the store. Don’t tell Ivy but this is going to be more about me than the store.

One of the other stores in town is having their version of a knitting retreat. Their knitting retreat has turned out to be a pretty good thing for our store. People that are in town for the knitting retreat are coming to our store to buy “Dyed by Darrell” yarns.

Three lovely women in town for the knitting retreat stopped by our store. One of the women picked out a beautiful skein of yellow and red skein of yarn. She asked, “If I buy this, will you sign the label?” She wasn’t talking to Ivy, she was talking to me!

All the negativity from Elaine and Ivy I have absorbed left my mind, body and soul. I would no longer need to hear, “We need more jewel tones, stop dyeing so much orange, and don’t you think that color is too bright.” I was signing autographs!

I signed the label, twice. (I couldn’t stop myself.) Just when I was about to mention that I also write the store’s advertising blog; the women started showing Ivy and I photos and videos of post-hurricane Houston. I didn’t get the opportunity to autograph a copy of a Monner’s Mumblings. I’m guessing the women didn’t realize Monner and Darrell were both me.

Later the same day, people from New Mexico here for the retreat bought some “Dyed by Darrell” yarn. They didn’t ask to have it autographed. They most likely thought it would be an extra charge. Ivy helped them find an Indian restaurant. We’re kind of handy like that, at Your Daily Fiber.

Oh yeah, Ivy got in some yarn called “Concentric”. I can sign the label, but it won’t mean as much.