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It was a “bucket list” night, last night. I didn’t plan for a “bucket list” night, but nonetheless, I had one. Elaine took off for an art fair/trade show in Salida, Colorado. Elaine took Ivy with her. Boy Twin has been doing great in school. As a reward was he was allowed to attend a sleep over at a friend’s house. Girl Twin has been doing equally well or better and received the same reward.

Here comes the “bucket list” part. I was home alone. Big deal? Well, I’ve never spent the night alone in this house. Fifteen years, not one night alone in this house. Oh, I wasn’t totally alone, I had three dogs and a couple pesky houseflies to keep me from actually being alone.

I wasn’t scared, I was just, well, lonely. I knew I could pick up the phone and call Elaine, and I did. It’s just not the same. It was glaringly obvious that every household job was mine, and only mine. I had to make sure the dogs were fed. I had to feed the chickens. It was my job to make sure the chickens got locked up for the night.

It was my job to swat houseflies. Usually, Boy Twin shoots the flies with one of those “Bug Assault” flying insect killers, but I took a more old fashioned method, and just hit them with a fly swatter. If you think I’m starting to drift away from my “bucket list” story, I’m just trying to give ideas on what to do if you are ever home alone.

I know, some of you love being alone in your house. I just not one of them. I tried to make the best of it. I played solitaire on the computer. It seemed appropriate because I was ALONE. I opened a can of tuna for dinner. The rest of my family aren’t big tuna fans. I showed ‘em. I ate tuna while they weren’t here.

After feeding dogs and chickens, locking up chickens, playing solitaire, and eating tuna, I decided to go to my room, (formerly shared with Elaine) to watch baseball on television. (Our Colorado Rockies, featuring Wade Davis, defeated the hated Dodgers of Los Angeles.) I used Elaine’s pillows and built myself a little fort on the bed. If this was a “bucket list” night, I was going to make it special!

It was about 1:00 AM when Walter (pit-bull/Great Dane mix) woke me crying at the side of my fort. He seemed to be saying, “Hey Monner, we’re the only ones here!” I asked him politely to go back to bed. The crying continued. Finally, I told him I was not sharing my fort, go outside and see if you can find Elaine, Ivy or the twins.” Secretly, I was hoping he would get eaten by a bear, a lion, or pack of coyotes.

Before you get all uppity, let me tell you a story. (Did I tell you the shortstop for the Colorado Rockies is Trevor Story?) As a child, my favorite movie was “Night of the Grizzly!” In that movie the hero’s dog was killed by a grizzly bear named “Satan”. Since watching that movie, I have wanted to avenge the death of my dog by killing my “Satan”. Kind of like a “bucket list” item. Obviously, Walter didn’t want to let me achieve another “bucket list” victory. He came back into the house and went to sleep.

Before I sat down to write this morning I let the chickens out. All three dogs (Walter, Maggie and Lizzie) lined up in front of me as if to say, “Hey, where is everyone? Aren’t you going to feed us? Open the door, I need out! Aren’t you going to close the door? You just let another fly in the house!”

Other than the watching baseball from my fort, oh yeah, and the tuna, the only good thing about being here alone is I’m not sharing the coffee with any one! There's another fly!

Our crazy lives!


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