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Furs, and no Moose

Another busy weekend. I apologize for being so late with the story. I had a meeting in town this morning at 8:00 AM. I am consulting a friend of Elaine's to remodel a room in her home. I have plenty of time for meetings but unfortunately, the carpenter I was meeting does not. I met with him at 8:00 AM on a Sunday. I must be a really nice guy.


Knowing I had this meeting I started writing this story last night. I had a good start on the story. I wish I would have "saved" before I shut off the computer. Actually, I wish I had a typewriter and paper. None of this "saving" (construction language). Not only do I lose everything I've done, Elaine tells me retroactively that I should have "saved" and how to "save".


OK, here we go again. I don't think this will be verbatim, but it will be close. I will sort of be plagiarizing myself.


It was a warm August evening forty-five years ago. It was the first time, of now thousands of times, I experienced Elaine fainting from the heat. We were standing at the alter and Elaine started to go. I told Elaine several times, "Bend your knees" while holding her upright. She went from 5'8" to 3'9" the more she bent her knees the shorter she got, her dress piling up on the floor. Eventually, we got to the "I do" and "stay together forever through sickness and in health". I meant it, and apparently, Elaine did too.


While I was on the road following a construction career, Elaine was home drawing power poles, tieing shoes, wiping noses, attending teachers' conferences, and making Halloween costumes for our kids. Not the drawing power poles part. She didn't do that for our kids.


After the kids had moved on, fate left us with the task of raising the grandkids. I was on the road playing construction, while Elaine was home drawing power poles, tieing shoes, wiping noses, attending teachers' conferences, and making Halloween costumes, this time for the grandkids. Not the power poles.


The second batch of kids moved on, construction has brought me home. Life is looking pretty good. But then I injured my back and lost the ability to walk. Elaine could have and maybe should have left. Once again she found herself drawing power poles, and tieing shoes. Elaine didn't wipe my nose, I have some dignity, but she would have. Teachers' conferences evolved into doctors' appointments. As for the Halloween costumes, I didn't get invited to any parties, so that lets her off the hook.


Now that I have recovered we will continue to enjoy each other. She does help me put on my socks every now and then. I have one of those sock installers with the ropes, but Elaine is faster. In sickness and in health, we were then and we are now in it for the long haul.


As I have mentioned before Elaine is involved in a huge project at work. The company she works for is rushing to bring electricity to the world to recharge their cars, smartphones, air fryers, and robotic vacuums.


Imagine my surprise when she said, "I'm going to take Friday off. Let's do something for our anniversary"


Me: What about the electric cars?

Elaine: (construction language)

Me: What do you want to do?

Elaine: I can make hotel and dinner reservations in Wyoming for Friday night. We can come back Saturday.

Me: Sounds OK to me.


I have a new camera lens to try out. All I need now is a big bull moose.


Friday morning we left for Wyoming. Two hours into the trip, a light went off in my head.


Me: I didn't bring anything to sleep in. Elaine: You have on jeans shorts, that will work

Me; We've been married forty-five years, have you ever seen me sleep in jeans shorts?

Elaine: Looks like you are sleeping naked.

Me: No, what if the hotel catches on fire? I need to find something to wear.

Elaine: We can stop at that sporting goods store in Wyoming. They should have something.


Now I realize why we are going to Wyoming. Elaine is going to the sporting goods store that sells furs. She needs furs for her garments, and I need a moose photo. Sounds good but there is a 100% chance Elaine is coming home with furs. I have a one percent chance to see a moose.


Elaine was right. The store had shorts and swimming trunks. Both would have worked for sleeping attire. The swimming trunks were forty-two dollars and the shorts (fishing) were thirty-six dollars. I was hoping no one in the hotel smokes in bed.


Elaine finished her fur transactions and asked, "What do you want to do now?"


Me: It is hours before we can check into the hotel. There is a Wally World forty miles up the highway. They will have gym shorts.

Elaine: Let's go.


Last year I asked the question, "What is the appropriate gift for a 44th wedding anniversary?" I'm not sure I received an answer. Apparently, the gift for a 45th wedding anniversary is gym shorts from the clearance rack at Wally World. Highly appropriate.


We were headed back to the hotel when Elaine asked/or stated, "Do you want to just go home?"


Me; And not wear my new shorts?

Elaine: You can wear them at home.


I didn't see a moose, but it was a fun day.


Our crazy lives!


Monner

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